This week on RAC...

lots of stuff runnin through my head, so we'll just hit em all in quick snippets...

* Jennifer and the team made it back all safe and sound from India. Well, I guess sound. They got back to town about 1 a.m. Monday morning, and when Jennifer finally laid down to sleep at 1:30 she said it was the first time she'd laid down in a bed in 48 hours. So that plus the severe jet lag and we're still trying to get back to a "normal" routine. So yes they are safe, but the sound part is still up for debate. :D

* I get to go visit Nick on Tuesday and I'm VERY excited. I love Nick, he's one of the coolest people I know. It's funny, I was at college while he was in high school, so he's the brother I didn't get the privilege of watching mature and grow up. But man I love who he's become and that I get to call him a brother.

* One of the coolest things I heard about from the trip to India was this. The people pretty quickly found out that Dad was a "senior pastor". He said that after he prayed for people, they would kneel, touch his feet with their hands, then kiss their fingers. He then found out that it was because they wanted to take the blessing/annointing that was on him back to their families. Wow. How powerful is that? One, I know that reaffirmed to Dad the responsibility we have as ministers to reflect Christ, but also, how sad is it that we in the "civilized American church" don't have that same respect or desire for the annointing God has placed on his children. We are so spoiled.

* Jennifer and I went and saw "The Dark Knight" this week. (I wasn't allowed to see it without her so I had to wait a few days.) LOVED it. I love the new interpretation of Batman anyway, and any movie with Morgan Freeman and Michael Caine is always good, but Heath Ledger was amazing as the Joker. He just personified insanity. However, it can't help but make me wonder how much of that played a part in his death. I know (from articles) that Ledger was the type of actor who totally immersed himself in a character both in front of the cameras and behind the scenes. We'll never know how much, but that has to wear on your psyche.

* Here is my "spiritual awakening" moment for the week. I love movies. I love theater. I love dramas. I love watching the "unlikely hero" type roles. You know, the ones where a person isn't a superhero or anything, but finds himself/herself in a situation where bravery and conviction are called upon. I love to watch the person stand in the face of danger or death and coolly look it in the eye and not flinch. I know I have a bit of a "Messiah complex" in that I want to save everyone and fix everything (not my job, God is helping with putting that desire into proper perspective) and I have a desire to be a "hero". I know it. It's why I like those movies, it's partly why I love sports. And as I'm watching a particular show and watching the guy stand confidently and unwaveringly with a gun in his face, I felt that adrenaline rush of "ooh, that's awesome"... but suddenly I heard that still voice in my spirit say "Is that how I want you to react?" and it kinda threw me for a loop. There was a LOOOOOOOONG process of discussion with God on what He meant by that, but I'll give you the summary. When we face persecution in our lives is it better to stand and stare it down with confidence and stoicism or to look with love and tears in our eyes? Just a thought. (there's a lot more I could say, but I'll stop there for now.)

* We are still prepping for our trips to Albania and Mexico in the coming months. We should have all our flights for Albania taken care of by tuesday next week (which will be a huge relief) but there are still lots of details to work out. Please pray for us, we would love it.

* Stupid Cardinals... get my hopes up and then forget how to win. I've decided to quit my day job and become a reliever/closer for the Cards. I can give up runs just as well as they can and I'll come with a MUCH cheaper price tag. You wait. It's gonna happen.

* Illini Football is just around the corner! Woo hoo!

Ok, that's all for now. Hope all is well with you, I don't know how often you'll get updates in Aug. It's gonna be an insane month. But I'll do my best. God bless.

One down... seven to go

Well, Jennifer (and most of my immediate family) left for India last night. They departed O'hare at 8:30. So it's just me and Kaylee at home. (And grandma at her house, but my aunt is coming to take care of her... supposedly.) The first night went about as badly as could be expected, ha. Kaylee wouldn't lie down cause she wanted "mommy" and finally fell asleep at 10:30. She didn't sleep well and kept making noises like she was waking up, so I didn't sleep well. And decided it was time to get up at 6:30 this morning. Of course she wasn't quite awake, so she wasn't tracking real well. In a matter of a few minutes we went from wanting to play with blocks, to wanting to play outside with bubbles (at 6:45 a.m. in the middle of a torrential downpour), to wanting crackers for breakfast, then pizza, then just milk. And to top it all off her pull-up was pretty full so we went to change it and she peed all over the floor before I could get her on the potty. Fun times. Please pray we both survive. In all seriousness, just pray she sleeps well. She usually likes to cuddle with mommy in the mornings and the concept of "mommies on a trip" isn't taking. Neither is "grandma and papa are on the trip too". My only real worry is I'll be so tired that I'll be zombie-fied while leading worship/preaching tomorrow. On the bright side, we play lots and her favorite game right now is to take off running when I'm changing her in the bathroom. She really is cute as she's running around butt naked, giggling and repeating "I'm a stinker" while I chase her. You can't help but laugh. God bless.

Dusting off the ol' soap box

Good day all, I hope you've had a pleasant summer so far and an enjoyable Fourth of July celebration. I fear this will turn into a rather lengthy post so I'll just jump right in.

A few weeks ago one of the blogs I frequent regularly had an installment touching upon the idea of different generations in ministry and trying to connect them and ease the transition in leadership. On this particular post a comment was posted. Now, before I go into anything I need to make a few things clear. I am NOT attacking the person who posted the comment (I'm not linking to it for this reason). I don't know this person, I don't know their background, I don't know anything about them. Perhaps what was said was not worded as this person meant it to be, all I can go off of is what was written, so bear in mind I am responding to the ideas put forth, NOT the person. Also, I am not angry or resentful or anything like that. I am passionate about what I'm about to blog upon, but I am not mad or anything. If you do decide to read the entire post and feel I am mistaken in my comments, please feel free to let me know. Thanks.

In this commentary on this unnamed blog a lot of questions were put forth about any apparent disconnect between the older and younger generations in the church. I won't speak to them all, but there were ideas that I wanted to comment on. (and I'll take them in order) Also, my comment should be taken in the context of speaking from and to people within the christian church.

1.) First of all, in each of the questions there was an apparant younger vs older vibe, with a lot of the blame being placed at the feet of the older generation. I guess I should clarify one point, while I no longer consider myself the "younger generation" the writer of the comment is 30, so we are of the same age. I hear a lot of comments about this generation or that generation messing up. A lot of times, it's the younger crowd groaning about the ignorance of the older crowd. The funny thing is I hear a lot of complaining and little suggestions on what to do. I hear even less people talking about the mistakes they themselves have made in relation to the issue, or what they are doing themselves to help. When I used to work in the Boys and Girls Club, we worked with a lot of what would be categorized as underpriveleged kids. And the one thing I tried to teach them was, while life may be unfair at times the only thing you can control is your reaction to the situation. You can't make anyone else think or act in any particular way. All you can do is control your own thoughts and actions to the situation. The same goes here. If we as the younger generation feel as though the older generation doesn't understand us, what are we doing to help it? Are we trying to understand them? Are we taking the time to find out why they believe/think/react the way they do all the while bemoaning the fact they aren't taking the time to find out about us? Are we even giving them the opportunity? Which leads me to topic number 2...

2.) The question was raised about the difference in willingness to invest in relationships, with the younger generation being shown with an intense willingness to invest in relationships. Myspace and Facebook being used as examples of that willingness. I disagree with this reasoning on this premise... Myspace and Facebook connections are not relationships, they are acquaintances. They can certainly be used as tools within a relationship, but in and of themselves they cannot be relationships. A relationship is messy, time-consuming, even inconvenient at times. A relationship takes investment, it takes opening yourself up to being abused and rejected. While the internet is great and obviously I use it, it is not effective for true relationship. This is especially true in christian discipling. You are reading my words right now, but you have no idea what my body language is like as I convey these thoughts. You don't know if I'm weary or energized, mellow or agitated, you don't even know if I'm a guy or a girl. (Obviously, I say I'm a guy and have pics of myself on my myspace and facebook... but unless you've met me personally, you don't REALLY know if I'm being truthful.) It's too easy to hide who we are online. If you email me and it's something I just don't want to deal with, I can either lie or ignore it until a later time. For all you know, I just haven't checked my email. It's a little harder to duck the issue if you ask me in person. This is relationship. Studies are starting to prove that while people in the 20's and 30's age group have more connections to people via the web they are lonelier than ever. Why? I believe it's because we have traded relationships for acquaintances. We want everything quick and easy, and relationships are just too messy for our instant gratification society. Which now leads me to the third point...

3.) The question of whether the disconnect is because of the shorter attention span in the younger generation. The statement being made that the younger gen. has about a 7 second attention. Ok. I have to admit, this one REALLY gets me going. I am soooooooo sick of hearing that my generation has no attention span and that it gets worse the younger you go. It REALLY gets me fired up when we bring it into the church. I do have to make a few clarifications. I am NOT talking about people with attention disorders and the like. I am also not talking about how the church approaches reaching the lost, but about interactions within the Body of Christ. Society says we have no attention span, I would expect the lost to act that way, they are under the chains of the world we live in. Why should I expect anything different from them? But the ones who are free... why should we act as though we are still in bondage??? I read scripture and I don't see a 7 second God. I don't see any of the heroes of the Bible who had a 7 second relationship with God. I see effort and work and perseverance and determination. What do I see when I see a 7 second approach? I see laziness. Yup, I said it. I see the attitude that God is no more important than that food commercial. I've heard many complain about the length of service and messages on Sunday morning. More than an hour is just too much for me. Why? Do we not have the discipline to invest time seeking what God has to say to us? I don't care if it's an expository on Deuteronomy, isn't all of scripture useful for teaching and preaching? It pains me when I hear someone come out of any type of meeting where scripture was read and say "there was nothing there for me". If scripture was read, isn't there always something? Whether it be new or a reminder or whatever, the word of God does not come back void... or are we too advanced for that old document now? Relationship takes investment, effort and intentionality. It is no different with God. A 7 second attention span is simply an excuse. Those of us who are married, do we approach our spouses the same way? If so, how's that workin out for ya? That line of reasoning is the world rationalizing laziness and self-centeredness, why do we allow it to infect our lives as believers?

Finally, I think that there is one common thread with all three of these issues and I've already mentioned it. Self-centeredness. It's all about me. I don't like the generation gap, how are you gonna fix it? This is how I do things, are you gonna get with it? I want it quick and easy to fit in with my schedule and if not, then I'm out. I'm not excusing any generation for any mistakes, neither the older ones or the younger ones. What I am trying to say is that we have to get away from a me-first, society driven approach. Instead we have to say, alright "x" needs to be different, the only thing I can control is how I react. How is that going to be? How will you react? How will I?

If you actually read all of that, then kudos to you. As always if you have any comments/questions/disagreements feel free to let me know. God bless and if you think of it pray for me and my fam. Jennifer, my parents, and my brother and his wife are all going to India for 9 days. That leaves just me and Kaylee. Yeah, I'm scared too. :D

Wait a second...

wasn't it just June 1??? And suddenly it's the June 21. Man this month has been a whirlwind. It started off innocently enough. But then we had the Arthur Days Festival (complete with massive flooding). And then the CFN Family Conference (which was awesome). And then I went and spent two days with the Bill Allison fam (sans Emily, currently out of state). And during that trip, Jenn was in Missouri with fam all week. Which leads us to today... which just happens to be Kaylee's 2nd birthday. And during all of this we're trying to finish strong in our missions trips while planning a whole new missions venture. As Kaylee would say "Goodness Gracious". All I ask is for a moment to breathe, ha.

But then I was reading an email from a friend, which lead me to a website with a video. In the video there was a quote. "Perserverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another." -Walter Elliot This got me thinking. I often think of life as a marathon and that's true. But no one runs a marathon with just the finish line in mind. I've run distance races before (not a marathon, I'm not into self-torture, lol) and I've never run with just the finish in mind. I always break it down into parts, both to keep it simpler and to keep the task not so daunting. "If I can make it just to that turn" "ok, just five more reps" "ok, that's good, now just another lap" stuff like that. And I'm one to do that in life too, just never thought of it in that regard. Of course, I'm in the middle of one heck of a stretch of "short races". Some days it's overwhelming and I'm just tired. But I also know that it's part of my marathon, and I want to finish strong. Plus I know that God has called Jennifer and I to this, and like I said in the last post, "My daddy sent me to do this, he must think I can handle it" and that gives me strength and faith.

Yup, I'm just rambling today, but that's what happens when I don't sleep for a week. God bless.

And we're back...

Yes, it's been awhile. It's not been due to lack of motivation or material, but because I've been dealing with one topic for quite some time. It started from a simple email from a friend in response to a blog about a month and a half ago, and has enveloped my spirit since. I am just chomping at the bit to post it, but I need to clarify a few things in my mind before I post. Not to make sure I "know it all" but so I am not just jumping into it without giving God (and others) time to speak to me on it. I will say it has directly to do with the concept of living a life of forgiveness. Emily Allison started it, and Papa Ken (Ken Sumrall if you don't know who that is) poured gasoline on the fire with his book "Forgive and move on: a case for unconditional forgiveness". (You can get that book and any others he has written here http://www.shop.kensumrallministries.com/main.sc I strongly encourage it, or if you live close to me, just ask to borrow them) Anyway, I hope to post that blog within a week or two.

That said I did have something I wanted to share today. This past week Mom, Dad, Jennifer, Kaylee and I were at the CFN Family Conference in Peachtree City, GA. CFN stands for Church Foundational Network, and it is the group of ministries that we at Cornerstone Fellowship are a part of. If you want to know more about it, just ask me and I'll be happy to share, but for the sake of space I won't go into that now. It was a 3 day conference and was awesome as always. I could post so much about what went on, but there was one item that I wanted to share, something that really resonated with me.

Pastor Jack Hollis is one of the Apostolic Council members and he spoke at the evening session on Wednesday. He was talking about a lot of things and he just almost in passing made reference to something that hit me right in between the eyes... in a good way. In 1 Samuel 17:34-36 it says
"But David said to Saul, "Your servant has been keeping his father's sheep. When a lion or a bear came and carried off a sheep from the flock, I went after it, struck it and rescued the sheep from its mouth. When it turned on me, I seized it by its hair, struck it and killed it. Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, because he has defied the armies of the living God."
Now if you've grown up in church you've heard this story, and it's a good one. But Pastor Jack made a comment about this particular situation that I'd never thought about. He said (and I'm paraphrasing, also Jack is from the south, so read this with a southern drawl, ha) "My daddy sent me to tend the sheep. Now he didn't plan on bears and lions comin at me, but he knew it was a possibility when he sent me. So he musta thought I could handle it." I loved that thought. And God is no different. He has called me to ministry. He has called me to be faithful to Him. God knows that tough stuff is gonna come, some of it by his design, some just because of the world of sin we live in. It might not be easy, but He knew it was coming when He sent me, he must think I can do it.

How encouraging is that? I'm a guy who tends to wear his emotions on his sleeve, to be swayed by how I'm feeling in the moment. Sometimes I get discouraged awfully easily and just can't seem to see the forest for the trees. But if I truly trust God, which I do believe I do, then I can trust that He won't send me into something that's more than I can handle in Him. As Jennifer and I try to figure out this thing God has called us to with missions and ministering in Arthur, it is a huge comfort to know that even though we are up against HUGE strongholds of religiousity and apathy, God knew it was here and would come against us, and he called us anyway. He must think we can do it. Sweet.

Anyway, that's my thought for the moment... there's a small chance of another post this evening... but I'm still sortin that one out. I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions. I pray all is well with you. God bless.

-Me

Because I know you were dying to know...

I've done one of these about a year and a half ago on myspace... but eh, why not do it again. The rules are once you've been tagged, you have to write a blog with 10 weird random facts, habits or goals about yourself. At the end, choose six people to be tagged, list their names and why you tagged them. (there are more rules, but I'm ignoring them for the moment... and I'll explain later.)

So here is some of the stuff you've been eager to learn about me, but never knew that you wanted to know...

1.) I have an irrational fear of snakes... any snake.

2.) I don't eat nuts, don't like them. However, it's not really because I don't like them. When I was a small child my mom didn't want me to choke on them, so she would just say "don't eat those, you don't like them" and whatta ya know, I don't like them. It's only been in the last few years that I've realized I do kinda like pecans (but only in things, not by themselves.)

3.) I was a sophomore in college for 4 years!!!! How cool am I?

4.) I have been on the radio in Chile. Three years ago I spoke on the radio (along with a friend, Tyler) at a Chilean radio station.

5.) My grandparents on my dad's side were amish... and my dad has 72 first cousins... I'm related to most of the county.

6.) I am having a serious crisis about turning 30 in august... so instead I shall be celebrating my one year anniversary of turning 29.

7.) Most people know me as very outgoing and personable and willing to do whatever is needed with no shame... but I have always struggled with serious self-esteem issues.

8.) I absolutely love the Illini... to the point that my mood can be affected by how they played on that day. I know, it's sad, but true.

9.) I have had two head injuries with memory loss in my life. Once in sixth grade and once when I was 21. Still have no direct memory of the events.

10.) My life can often be summed up by a t-shirt my brother bought for me. "Danger: Mouth operates faster than brain." And it is soooooo true....

So there ya go... now I'm supposed to "tag" six people and list them here. However, I don't have a lot of contacts on blogger yet, and the couple I do have either tagged me (melissa) or were already tagged (by melissa) so I'm just gonna leave it at that. Anyway, hope that wasn't a monumental waste of your time. I actually have a more serious post to put on later, but don't have time at the moment. God bless.

-Matt

White water rafting on the River of God

I apologize that the posts have been a little inconsistent lately. I'm about to explain a little of that. I am still working on posting the second half of the "lost the plot" post, but struggling with how far I am to take it right now... but hopefully soon. The biggest reason for the delays is my schedule for the summer. A few years ago Jennifer and I really felt God was directing us toward a life of missions trips facilitating, and this summer has been a major milestone in that. We are coordinating 3 separate trips (with a possible fourth in the fall) this summer. We are also attending a conference this summer. We are taking our annual trip to the Camp Maurer campground in Excelsior Springs, MO. (just outside Kansas City) from May 22 to the 25. Camp Maurer is the Assemblies of God campground for the Northern Missouri Disctrict. And while we are not an A\G church, Jenn's parents are the caretakers. We help clean and prepare the camp for the coming summer. It has been an amazing experience every year and the act of serving has affected us all profoundly. Then we are flying to Peach Tree, GA (outside Atlanta) for the CFN Family Conference. I am SOOOOOOO excited, but to explain would take way too long right now. In July, a group from the church is going to Ongole, India from the 11th to the 20th. I am not going so I can take care of the church services and Kaylee. (The rest of the pastoral staff is going, along with Jennifer.... so I'm the man while they are gone, lol. Pray for me.) And then Jennifer and I are going to Albania with a group of people from Canada, Ireland and Germany August 23-Sept. 4. So as you can see LOTS of flights, preparation and money-raising is being worked on. I promise to try and most more regularly once we get the hang of all this.

I do have one thing to share. The other day I was picking up Kaylee at my parents house. As we were leaving she insisted on walking on the stones lining the driveway. She was doing pretty well, but the stones were a little uneven and giving her some problems. She could have done it herself, but I just walked over to help. As soon as she took my hand she was walking much straighter and quicker. At that moment I heard that still small voice say "That's how it is with you and me. You can do much of this on your own, but it's so much easier when you trust me." and I just smiled. Because it's so true. So as we prep for all these trips I'm just trying to keep my hand in His and enjoy the stroll. God bless.